i finally got the news that i have been waiting for-i will be going to air force school. shortly after the happiness came a wave of uncertainty

'will i be able to pass the course?'
'will i be posted back here if i failed my course??'

soon, i dont feel happy at all. i felt absolutely uncertain and in a sense, unhappy. why? i dont really have an answer for that. what some of my friends said certainly made me felt worse. 'joey, we are gonna miss u leh.. dun go leh..'

man, how i wished i can tell them i wont be going but that will make me a lying a$$. so all i am hoping is that either

a) i pass the test and make it as a pilot
or
b) i fail the course and hopefully return back to my camp and be back working together with them.

life never seems to give us an easy life after giving us what we wish for..